From finding home to Loch Lomond

My fabulous father has bought me a sat-nav! I think he is trying to tell me something about my navigational abilities! No seriously, he knows I have problems when I leave what Ali would term 'our world'. My trips to Smoggieland and Stockton-On-Tees were proof enough of that. So I now have a TomTom. This thing could be a god-send if I can familiarise myself with how to work it! You can even choose a certain voice to give you your directions - which has had my sides splitting with laughter. You can have Darth Vader, ('you have now completed your trip to the dark side'), a farmer voice, a Barnsley accent - a whole manner of voices. (As opposed to Jane or Tim which are your initial choices). Jane is clear - but a woman, and Tim sounds gay - so I reckon I will have to download another voice. The Scottish accented voice was gorgeous, but there is a charge for this choice - obviously a better quality! I am sure we will have some fun with this new technology!

We have been house hunting again this week. It is very....draining. I felt absolutely exhausted following our run of 6 house viewings the other day. Emotional, so emotional. For me particularly. D seems to approach every house we consider as in investment, a business deal or in a financial way; where as I throw my heart and sole into imagining whether we could live there, falling in love with places we cannot have or cant afford, pondering what I would change about this bit and that bit. My mind was spinning so fast when we got back and I was 'up a height' to say the least. It took four drinks to clam me down. To top it all off I burnt the bloody roast beef we were having for dinner, which ruined the one meal we have all been able to sit and have together properly in a long time. Typical.

It's D's BIG birthday next Friday. He is not looking forward to it to say the least. I have ummd and aahhhd about what to do and get for him to celebrate. My initial surprise was a lifetime membership to the Clan McLaren Society, but that was ruined when the documentation arrived in the post addressed to both of us. He doesn't want a party or gathering, (I guess it wouldn't be the top of my list at 50 either), and we both happen to be working that day too, despite trying to swap my shifts. So my decision was a few days away in a cottage over-looking Loch Lomond. Back in Scotland, his home, but somewhere he has not yet visited. My family all contributed as no-one really knew what to get him, and short of another cabinet full of various bottles of whisky, there were no ideas being offered. Miss Indecisive tries being decisive - I hope I made the right decision. Accompanied by an Indian takeaway and a good bottle of wine - surely I cant go wrong?

Canny hoose!

Big news - the house is sold subject to contract! Woohoo! But no champagne until there is a signature on the dotted line! So the stress is now to find a house, not sell the house!

I thought I would enjoy house hunting more than I am. There is not as much choice as there was several years ago. And now having taken quite a drop in price for ours, we are certainly limited for our purchase. There are a few that we could be happy in I am sure, but do you compromise on something so important? But is it that important, because who's to say we won't move again? As long as it is re-saleable? It is impossible with what we can afford to have the location we want and the size house we would like.

It is boiling down to a really spacious house with four double bedrooms in an okay position in an okay location, or reasonable size property with three (two double) bedrooms in a really good position and really good location. The latter of course is more expensive and would stretch us, the first we could manage comfortably on a monthly basis. These are crazy hard decisions!

We had our valentines day on Friday the 13th. Friday the 13th!!! Bloody hell, that was brave. I am usually so superstitious, but there was no other time given our respective shifts. A champagne picnic......in the master bedroom! I realised the closest I was going to get to romantic candles and rose petals on the bed was if I arranged them myself. So I did. It looked beautiful - even Ali said so. I was very impressed with myself. D was more impressed with the bubbly and the afters! Such is life.

Doing more regular night shifts has been getting me down. Struggling is probably an understatement. I may have to rethink this whole situation and my childcare arrangements. When Ali starts school full time in September, my childminder will be unable to collect/drop her off anyway, so following the summer holidays I have a problem. However there is a before and after school club I could utilise - but this would mean a few very long days for Ali at school. How do you know what is best? Yet another parenting challenge. They are stacking up.