My two weeks holiday from work have finally started, following several gruelling weeks of running close to the edge and repetitive tears. It's strange that you begin to find yourself so run into the ground immediately before your holidays are due! Good timing? Or do we just know when we are going to need them?
Today I attended a gathering arranged for a colleague of mine in celebration of her retirement. Lunch out - it was great. It was really great. To see everyone out of work, laughing and smiling. A totally stress free environment - the opposite of work! And more wine! I think it may be wine weekend. Everyone looked amazing. It's funny because we all wear scrubs for work so no one has any kind of figure, but when midwives 'scrub up' to go out - they don't do it by halves! Make-up, floaty yet fitted clothing and many, many heels. As it should be. We will miss her, I will miss her - she was a great support and became a good friend; and she is not nearly old enough to be retiring!
We are off to visit the MIL on Monday. Ali is very excited about seeing Granny. Scotland for a few days and then Granny will come home with us for a few days. No Sky TV, no computer, likely no phone signal - how on earth will I cope??? I may have to take a reading book, how very... intellectual. I may well just go out and buy Cosmo, just in case!
Of late I find I have come to a decision point in my life. It is now time to decide on whether or not to have another baby. This I think would have been my actual 'brooding' time if our first had been as per my original life plan; but ironically it ties in with Ali being 4, and she is constantly asking for a brother or sister. I had always said I couldn't even think about it until Ali was at school because I knew I would not cope at home with two pre-school age. I do not want to leave a huge gap between my children and I feel as time moves on the less I am likely to want to under-go the trials of childbearing again. (As much as I loved the stretch marks, saggy boobs and sleepless nights!) And I always wanted more than one because I was very close to my brother and cannot imagine having an only child. All in all this is looking more and more like the time to go for it. Or certainly enjoy trying! So, while I am popping diet pills to shed as much weight as possible in weeks, rather than months and years, (because we may go for it sooner rather than later); D is cacking himself about how this will effect our 'financial situation'. Although he has agreed we should think about it again now.
Hand in hand with this decision is the fact I have to put aside my wedding plans once again. Which is a shame, because I have just revisited Matfen Hall during an open evening - and it is more gorgeous than I remember. Interestingly I received a brochure which listed all the venues for civil ceremonies in the county, and there are many venues much cheaper than Matfen Hall - which is a shame, as money may dictate the day in the end. It could be beautiful to have my children with us on our wedding day, so it may be a good decision to have another before we tie the knot. Isn't life hard!? I mean these are massive life changing events I am casually debating here! Massive.
After managing a marginal 'lie in' yesterday, we decided to try out the 'Maize Maze' at our local organic food farm, with a friend of mine and her son who is the same age as Ali. The kids managed the whole event really well. We kept their spirits up by reciting lines from films and they managed to collect 14 of the 17 letters we had to find to spell out words, before everything was drawn to a close by Ali needing a poo! It was becoming quite hot by this point and we had walked round in circles for some time, so it was likely a blessing in disguise. It was a great idea for a change from the norm though. Perhaps it would be good to return when they are slightly older - when they can actually recognise the letters and form words! It was fun though and later it gave us mothers a chance to drink wine and catch up! And we never say no to a bottle of wine, ever!
Today I attended a gathering arranged for a colleague of mine in celebration of her retirement. Lunch out - it was great. It was really great. To see everyone out of work, laughing and smiling. A totally stress free environment - the opposite of work! And more wine! I think it may be wine weekend. Everyone looked amazing. It's funny because we all wear scrubs for work so no one has any kind of figure, but when midwives 'scrub up' to go out - they don't do it by halves! Make-up, floaty yet fitted clothing and many, many heels. As it should be. We will miss her, I will miss her - she was a great support and became a good friend; and she is not nearly old enough to be retiring!
We are off to visit the MIL on Monday. Ali is very excited about seeing Granny. Scotland for a few days and then Granny will come home with us for a few days. No Sky TV, no computer, likely no phone signal - how on earth will I cope??? I may have to take a reading book, how very... intellectual. I may well just go out and buy Cosmo, just in case!
Of late I find I have come to a decision point in my life. It is now time to decide on whether or not to have another baby. This I think would have been my actual 'brooding' time if our first had been as per my original life plan; but ironically it ties in with Ali being 4, and she is constantly asking for a brother or sister. I had always said I couldn't even think about it until Ali was at school because I knew I would not cope at home with two pre-school age. I do not want to leave a huge gap between my children and I feel as time moves on the less I am likely to want to under-go the trials of childbearing again. (As much as I loved the stretch marks, saggy boobs and sleepless nights!) And I always wanted more than one because I was very close to my brother and cannot imagine having an only child. All in all this is looking more and more like the time to go for it. Or certainly enjoy trying! So, while I am popping diet pills to shed as much weight as possible in weeks, rather than months and years, (because we may go for it sooner rather than later); D is cacking himself about how this will effect our 'financial situation'. Although he has agreed we should think about it again now.
Hand in hand with this decision is the fact I have to put aside my wedding plans once again. Which is a shame, because I have just revisited Matfen Hall during an open evening - and it is more gorgeous than I remember. Interestingly I received a brochure which listed all the venues for civil ceremonies in the county, and there are many venues much cheaper than Matfen Hall - which is a shame, as money may dictate the day in the end. It could be beautiful to have my children with us on our wedding day, so it may be a good decision to have another before we tie the knot. Isn't life hard!? I mean these are massive life changing events I am casually debating here! Massive.
It's like the harvest festival at home right now. I am snowed under in droves of cucumbers, the conservatory is more phallic than Ann Summers and I am having to give them away. The small sweet tomatoes are unbelievably gorgeous we are eating them straight from the vine. Pepper growing has been a complex, but I am getting a few small offerings, and the strawberries are being stolen by the snails and slugs! I am no green fingers however - I prefer them Red, hot! The multitude of fruit and veg come with a dark side too though. The conservatory is a giant fly magnet! (A giant conservatory not giant fly that is!) Courtesy of my Dad, I have a fabulous insecticide pen that you use to draw around the window pane. I would rather have a fly graveyard to contend with on a daily basis than a fly commune. At least they are not buzzing around our heads anymore!
